Keeping abreast of the news

Romanian tennis player Simona Halep, had breast reduction surgery, to help improve her game.

No word if she consulted with Serena!

Pentagon brownie recipe is now 31 pages

It's now been updated from 26 pages.

Eggs? Section 3.2.6:

Whole eggs may be liquid or frozen and shall have been processed and labeled in accordance with the Regulations Governing the Inspection of Eggs and Egg Products (7 CFR Part 59).

Walnuts? Section 3.2.5.3

Nuts, walnuts, shelled. Shelled walnut pieces shall be of the small piece size classification, shall be of a light color, and shall be U.S. No. 1 of the U.S. Standards for Shelled English Walnuts. A minimum of 90 percent, by weight, of the pieces shall pass through a 4/16-inch diameter round hole screen and not more than 1 percent, by weight, shall pass through a 2/16-inch diameter round hole screen. the shelled walnuts shall be coated with an approved food grade antioxidant and shall be of the latest season's crop.
Here's the 26 page recipe.

In the good old days, it was just 22 pages!

Those brownies are one heckuva job!

Now we just have BP!

Heckuva job ............!

They could of just asked Tiger's mistress #14, for her brownie recipe instead!

MTA bus drivers get two months paid leave if they get spit on

A bizarre policy has allowed city bus drivers to land an average of two months paid time off -- with one staying at home for more than half a year -- every time a rider spits on them.

The outrageous arrangement comes courtesy of TWU Local 100's strong union contract and the willingness of MTA officials to categorize spitting incidents as "assaults" -- even though the state penal code doesn't.

Of the 153 bus drivers who took time off because of assaults last year, 51 -- one-third -- did so solely because a disgusting rider decided to spew his frustrations, MTA officials said at a committee hearing yesterday.

And they averaged a whopping 64 days of paid time off for each incident, the officials said.

Someone found Bernanke's reading material in the bathroom

Subprime? It's contained? Europe? It's contained also!

Let us revisit Geithner's comments just 10 days ago:

May 15 (Bloomberg) -- Treasury Secretary Timothy F. Geithner expressed confidence that Europe will resolve the debt crisis buffeting the region and said the U.S. economy is strong enough to withstand any fallout.

“Europe has the capacity to manage through this,” Geithner said in an interview on Bloomberg Television’s “Political Capital With Al Hunt,” airing this weekend. “And I think they will.”

Geithner, 48, said he doesn’t think the European turmoil will hurt U.S. growth because “our economy is getting stronger. We’re seeing a lot of strength, improvement and confidence.”

He learned from Bernanke!

Overseas Madoff investors get 100 cents on the dollar back

MADRID — About 720,000 investors outside the United States who lost money to the convicted swindler Bernard L. Madoff have settled with their banks, receiving about $15.5 billion in all, according to law firms representing those victims of the fraud.

The settlements cover about 80 percent of the clients represented by the firms, said Javier Cremades, founder of Cremades & Calvo-Sotelo, a Madrid law firm, who helped organize the global alliance of 60 firms a year ago.

The $15.5 billion figure represents, in theory, 100 percent of the amount clients had invested, Mr. Cremades said, but excludes in almost all cases the bogus paper gains that were listed on investor statements.

Looks like the oversea banks didn't want any discovery on their books!

Everything is now like cocaine

We hear that greed caused the meltdown, and that making money is as addictive and destructive as cocaine.

Here's that story:

An example cited in his book involves a successful hedge-fund manager responsible for a $300 million fund who is constantly looking for new investments. Gawande's discussion with the fund manager is about how to avoid making bad investment decisions. Turns out, in addition to being smart and having loads of financial information, it takes extreme discipline. That's because of something called "cocaine brain."

What?


Researchers have discovered that making money, such as is done by investors, stimulates the same part of the brain that using cocaine stimulates. The more you have, the more you want until it kills you, or you learn to control it. The hedge-fund manager points out that many big investors get into trouble because of "cocaine brain."


Now think about what happened on Wall Street. People with huge amounts of money couldn't stop trying to get more. Despite being smart, they lost their ability to make sound judgments, just like cocaine users. In Gawande's example, the investor has figured out a way to avoid the "cocaine brain" syndrome by religiously sticking to an investment decision checklist he has developed.

On fact, this story was picked up by MSM:



So now add videogames to your cocaine checklist!

But somehow, that doesn't have the same story line unless it's coke and Wall Street!

Why did Obama's bank, Shorebank get bailed out?

iPads don't work in the hot sun

Today we've seen two people report that their iPads have displayed the "iPad needs to cool down before you can use it" message.

The iPad is officially out in the UK next Friday. Jon Silk and James Whatley got their iPads from the US and decided it would be a good idea to use them out in the sun - the iPads disagreed.

BP's Merger

Hah!!!

BANZAI7 NEWS--In a surprise development, BP announced a proposal to merge with Bubba Gump's Shrimp Restaurants. The newly combined entity will be named Bubba Pump's. BP sees the merger as a synergistic solution to its runnaway Gulf oil leak.

Goldman is back shorting positions concentrated with the hedge fund crowd

But they have a different name for it. High beta underperforms during market sell-offs!


GS main 0524

Venus: It's all an illusion!!

Look at what Venus wore at the French Open. She said her flesh colored panties were all an illusion!

You make that call!

It looks as effective as a Rachel Uchitel bikini! (And now that Tiger has split from his wife, how long before he has a relapse with her?)

But speaking of golf,  finally, we have a sport picture that will cause as much of a buzz as when golfer Christie Kerr, kissed her trophy, in 2005.

She better have Goldman help her with their Financial Fornication cover!

But this is a stock market blog, so I have to give the bears a picture also!

Is it just an illusion?

You make that call!

Because for once, they kicked a leg off of the bulls!

But we'll see how they are standing later!

Morning tout sheet stops the future selling

Goldman touts 1300 S&P
Morgan Stanley touts oil to $95 and AAPL to $310
Citigroup touts GOOG to $640

Goldman "Sacks"

Goldman Sachs Will Furlough Top Executives
To Help Close NY State Deficit 


Goldman Sachs Will Furlough Top Executives
To Help Close NY State Deficit

May 21, 2010

New York, May 21, 2010 - The Goldman Sachs Group, Inc. (NYSE: GS) today announced that as of May 26, 2010, the firm's highest-paid executives will be furloughed one day per week. The money saved will be donated to the State of New York, to help close the state's budget deficit.

“Our company must set an example for the financial industry as a whole, and this is just a start,” said Andrew Mammon, Director of Media Relations for The Goldman Sachs Group, Inc. “Last year profits on Wall Street hit a record high of $61 billion – nearly three times the previous record. If we donate 20% of that to New York State, it would cover the state’s entire $9 billion deficit. In fact, it would provide $3 billion more – a 'bonus' to fund improved education, transit and health care for all New York.”

Goldman Sachs announced the new executive furlough program in response to the rapid recovery of financial industry profits, made possible by billions of dollars in taxpayer-financed loans. “Financial industry firms are posting record-setting profits, while the rest of the country remains stuck in a deep recession,” said Mammon. “It's time for Wall Street to reimburse Main Street. It will strengthen our economy at the base, and it's the right thing to do.”

Goldman Sachs economists have concluded that cuts in state spending are harming the economic recovery. In the first quarter of 2010, reductions in state and local government spending subtracted half a percentage point from the increase in GDP. The company's “give-back” initiative will help avoid more damage.

In a conference call with analysts and investors, Mammon expressed concern about new proposals for New York State to enact a “bonus recapture tax,” close corporate tax loopholes, and retain a portion of the stock transfer tax that is currently rebated at 100%. “If we voluntarily donate billions of dollars in the public interest, that will make it clear that such proposals are unnecessary,” said Mammon. “That's why it is important that other firms join us in this effort.”

Failure to act voluntarily will increase likelihood of mandatory measures, he warned: “Last year the top 25 hedge fund managers were paid an average of more than $1 billion apiece. The cash portion of Wall Street bonuses for 2009 is a near-record $20.3 billion. When people read headlines like that, it makes them a little crazy to hear that their homebound grandma's meals-on-wheels program has been cut off.”

Mammon dismissed Gov. Paterson's proposed furlough for state employees as “a gimmick” that does not address financial reality. “That's not where the money is,” he said. “The largest state worker union is CSEA -- and their members' average salary is less than $40,000.” State workers earn an average of 11% less than comparable employees in the private sector, according to a recent study by the National Institute on Retirement Security.

The governor's worker-furlough proposal would save at most $250 million, noted Mammon, while the state deficit stands at $9 billion. “In contrast, our financial executive furlough program would provide a real solution to the state's fiscal problems – problems that began right here on Wall Street.”

“When we help New York preserve kindergarten and public colleges, community health centers and environmental protection, we will truly be doing God's work,” said Mammon.
________________________
The Goldman Sachs Group, Inc. is a leading global investment banking, securities and investment management firm that provides a wide range of financial services to a substantial and diversified client base that includes corporations, financial institutions, governments and high-net-worth individuals. Founded in 1869, the firm is headquartered in New York and maintains offices in London, Frankfurt, Tokyo, Hong Kong and other major financial centers around the world.

Investor Contact:
Andrew Mammon
Tel: 212-681-4640

Media Contact:
Lucas Vandamm
Tel: 212-681-4640

Brittany Murphy's husband dead

LOS ANGELES – The husband of Brittany Murphy was found dead at his Los Angeles home late Sunday, five months after the Hollywood actress died, police said.

Brittany Murphy, according to the coroner report, didn't abuse drugs, and only had medications consistent with a cold or respiratory infection--community acquired pneumonia--even though she had these meds in her body:

Propranolol, Hydrocodone, Phenazopyridine, Fluoxetine, Dextromethorphan, Chlorpheniramine, in her urine and in her blood/heart methamphetamines were found.

And these were found in her medicine chest:

Klonopin (anxiety med), Carbamazepine (treats Diabetic symptoms and is also a bipolar med), Ativan (anxiety med), Vicoprofen (pain reliever), Hydrocodone (pain med), Topamax (anti-seizure med also to prevent migraines), Propranolol (hypertension, used to prevent heart attacks), Biaxin (antibiotic), Methylprednisolone (anti-inflammatory), Fluoxetine (depression med) and miscellaneous vitamins.

PIMCO doesn't want Uncle Sam's debt, but paper from Mexico and Russia

SYDNEY (Dow Jones)--The Australian unit of Pacific Investment Management Co., the world's largest bond fund, is buying debt from emerging markets such as Russia, Brazil and Mexico and Australia as part of its strategy to counter volatility in global bond markets.

At the core of its outlook are bets on a robust recovery in emerging markets while developed markets enjoy only a tepid growth trend.



Whatever happened to shaking hands with Uncle Sam?

I guess that's what happens when you think the next black swan is hiding at Treasury!

Tiger's wife--"Show me the money--$750 million--and give me the kids too!"

Wronged wife Elin Nordegren is trying to club an eye-popping $750 million out of Tiger Woods in their divorce negotiations, according to reports Friday.

Woods hasn't agreed yet, but if he does he wants total silence from his soon-to-be ex about the collapse of their marriage - forever, according to the Chicago Sun-Times.

Nordegren has so far said no to signing a lifetime "confidentiality clause" that would prevent her from writing a book or doing any interviews about the split.

She reportedly also wants full custody of their two kids even though it was first thought the couple were going to agree to joint custody.

Sources said the divorce negotiations "have turned extremely testy" and the couple no longer talk to each other.

Remember this txt from Tiger to porn star Joslyn James?

Tiger:Sent: 07:35 p.m.
Having a few issues at home. Might be a little later before i see you tonight
Tiger:Sent: 07:39 p.m.
Parent hood melt down:)...

Now its a meltdown!

The bull regroups

It will start with rallies in oil and gold next week.

The flagmen pension boost

 NYT
In Yonkers, more than 100 retired police officers and firefighters are collecting pensions greater than their pay when they were working. One of the youngest, Hugo Tassone, retired at 44 with a base pay of about $74,000 a year. His pension is now $101,333 a year.

Despite all the attention, police are now being paid as flagmen by Con Edison on their days off, Mr. Simpson confirmed, adding that the city was tacking the extra hours onto their pay, which is then reported to the state pension fund. 

“The system encourages police to take as much overtime as they can in the last year before retirement. That’s the way the system is structured,” he said. “There’s nothing illegal or unethical about this.”

..The benefits have been enacted by legislators, signed into law by governors, hailed by comptrollers and adopted by local officials — all of whom were told by actuaries and other financial advisers that the pensions would cost just a fraction of what they are now turning out to cost.

The ESPN garbage can pooper

 Crap in a garbage can, and then sue ESPN for violating the Fair Employment Practices Act for firing her!

Lawsuit

Oh My! Save the banks in Europe with a FDIC type program!

Look at how hysterical Larry Kudlow gets 2:30 into this clip last night.
And, of course, you have the requisite contribution from the ladies, showing  they have their handswrapped  around this situation.

Oh My!!!

Take the FAS!

That's the gubbermint play, and the gubbermint will be stepping in!

Heck last night, I heard Kudlow say Armageddon is back on the table!!

Oh My!!

Taking SHLD at 87.

The elitists fear the people

ZH
Here’s a case of life imitating art above. Besides the massive confrontation between the military and protestors (Red Shirts) in Bangkok yesterday that yielded the above photo, the aftermath of the destruction of the Red Shirts’ camp yielded even more destruction, as looters set fire to an upscale mall, the Thai Stock Exchange, the central bank along with other large commercial bank offices, and the Channel 3 television station. More than 36 buildings were set ablaze last night in Bangkok. Below you can see a video of the upscale mall, Central World, on fire, and a photo of it during happier times last Christmas. Today it has been reported that damage was so extensive that it may need to be completely razed. Central World, a 1.024M square meter complex, is the second largest mall in Bangkok.

To grant you an idea of the absolutely chaotic and dangerous situation that furiously ignited so quickly in Bangkok yesterday, the equivalent scenario in New York would be if rioters set Fifth Avenue, the NY branch of the Federal Reserve, Wall Street, JP Morgan, Goldman Sachs, and the CNN news station ablaze, all in a period of a few hours. Or in Los Angeles, the comparable scenario would be if the Beverly Center, Rodeo Drive, the Federal Reserve downtown, Bunker Hill, and ABC news station were all set ablaze.

While the Thailand conflict has been presented by the media as a war between the deposed and exiled former Prime Minister Thaksin Shinawatra and his supporters and the current Prime Minister Abhisit Vejjajiva and his supporters, the issue the mass media has not once addressed and will likely never address is an issue that even the majority of Red Shirts (the protestors) probably don’t even understand.  No matter whose side you are on, random destruction of a public mall and threatening the livelihood of innocent victims is uncalled for and wrong under any circumstance, so what possibly could have instigated such an outpouring of rage? People rarely dig deeper to get to the root causes of the ill-guided manifestations of desperation, so that's what we're going to do here.

While the bad results of a massive conflict makes for good news, it's very easy to fall into the media trap of categorizing these events as black v. white, us v. them, and evil v. good. However, in almost every one of these situations, many nuances of grey exist, and it is NOT as simple as Darth Vader v. Luke Skywalker.  Without getting into the politics of who’s right and who’s wrong in the Thailand conflict, let’s investigate an extremely important and underlying current of this conflict and every major economic conflict that is occurring in the world today - how a fraudulent global monetary system so significantly contributes to conditions of oppression and class division warfare.

US Congressman Ron Paul stated, “The Federal Reserve has been given the power, and the authority, to create money out of thin air. It’s fraudulent and it’s theft.” Since all Central Banks in the world all create money out of thin air and act in the same manner, they rob from all citizens of the world. However, the class that is always hurt the most by the actions of Central Banks is the poor, as the degradation and destruction of purchasing power hurts their very ability to survive. And when their ability to survive is threatened, this is when resistances form and revolutions occur. In the Western's leading nations, when situations such as those we are witnessing in Thailand and in Greece materialize, as seems inevitable now, the situations will likely be markedly worse. Why? Thoroughout history, revolutions have been sparked by two situations:

(1)When the poor have struggled for so long that they feel they have nothing to lose, even in death; or
(2) When the middle class of a country begins migrating into the ranks of the poor due to austere monetary policies imposed upon them by their bankers and governments.

In America, if this should happen, this will be a particularly dangerous situation, for the sinking of a particularly well-armed middle class into poverty would present a far more dangerous and complicated situation than one in which poorly armed protestors attempt to rise up against a well-armed opposition.

In 2008, world banks and western militaries acknowledged the very strong likelihood of civil unrest in the first world. Consider the following stories that were reported more than one-and-a-half years ago and by and large, laughed off by those that live in the Western world as Hollywood tall tales:

“Pentagon resources and U.S. troops may be used if needed to quell protests and bank runs during an economic crisis, the U.S. Army War College's Strategic Institute reported. ‘Widespread civil violence inside the United States would force the defense establishment to reorient priorities in extremis to defend basic domestic order and human security,’ the War College study states. Incidents of economic collapse, terrorism and disruption of legal order could require deployment of forces within the US, it said. A ‘strategic shock’ could require the nation to use ‘military force against hostile groups inside the United States.’” 

“International Monetary Fund Managing Director Dominique Strauss-Kahn has warned that advanced nations could face civil unrest during distressful economic times. ‘[S]ocial unrest may happen in many countries – including advanced economies’ if the economic crises are not properly dealt with, Strauss-Kahn said. ‘He added that violent protests could break out in countries worldwide if the financial system was not restructured to benefit everyone rather than a small elite,’ London's Guardian reported."

What is particularly telling in the above stories is that the managing director of the IMF, a notoriously elitist banking organization, admitted that our current financial system only benefits a “small elite.” For those that believe that the US Army War College’s Strategic Institute’s report of future civil conflict inside the US is far-fetched, you must realize that the bankers already KNOW that their current plan of destroying monetary value in all major global currencies will cause the middle class of Western nations to migrate into the ranks of the poor. The bankers already know that massive civil unrest all around the world is inevitable given the course they have chosen for all of us. The bankers are ALREADY CLOSELY MONITORING the situations in Greece, Thailand, Portugal, Iceland, Ireland, and other countries to understand how they must react to it when it hits the shores of the Western world. And because the bankers already know that their policies ensure uprisings in Western nations in future years, they are planning for it right now, six or seven steps ahead of the sleeping masses of people. Will the people wake up, or will it be checkmate already by the time they do?

Gisele Bunchden and the euro

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Thailand stock exchange on fire

BANGKOK—Hard-line Thai protesters set fire Wednesday to the country's stock exchange, shopping malls and a television station, while Thai authorities called an 8 p.m. curfew, casting doubt on the prospects for a resolution to the country's weeks-long political crisis despite the surrender of protest leaders earlier in the day.

Goldman's advice for clients sucks

May 19 (Bloomberg) -- Goldman Sachs Group Inc. racked up trading profits for itself every day last quarter. Clients who followed the firm’s investment advice fared far worse.

Seven of the investment bank’s nine “recommended top trades for 2010” have been money losers for investors who adopted the New York-based firm’s advice, according to data compiled by Bloomberg from a Goldman Sachs research note sent yesterday. Clients who used the tips lost 14 percent buying the Polish zloty versus the Japanese yen, 9.4 percent buying Chinese stocks in Hong Kong and 9.8 percent trading the British pound against the New Zealand dollar.

Hewlett Packard gets a bump after earnings

HPQ is trading up a dollar after earnings.

The shorts thought that no matter what HPQ reported, the boys would sell the stock on the news.

Not happening so far. 

Because the doomsdayers overplayed their hand, once again, with this afternoon's selloff.

JPMorgan gets into the repo game

Last week, I was playing cards in the early morning hours, and after taking the jackpot, I got in a friendly shoving match. Unfortunately, the keys to my car were in the pocket, and the key broke in the alcohol induced machoism.

I had already lost my spare, so I needed to take the car into the dealer anyway, so I called a tow truck,and around 3:30 in the morning, big Bubba finally showed up to take me home. We talked in the cab as he towed me home, and I found out that his specialty was repos, and that business has never been better.

He told me about repo hazard pay, how people hide their cars, and how aggressive JP Morgan has been on repos. They now give him $600  a car, and even before the people are 60 days past due, JP Morgan proactively notifies him, so he can go and put trackers on their car. As soon as they are then past 60 days, that night, he goes and picks up the car. Some are blocked in, which he unblocks, some are parked a few blocks away from their home, but almost all of the cars go home to Chase.

The repo man, with the pre 60 day tracker, gets the cars early.

Especially if he works for Chase!

The Naked Office

The nudity was supposed to bring their office closer together, and help out the bottom line.

‘I believe this extreme process will help them push their boundaries and become a close team that trust each other enough to get naked together.’

The nudes were publicising tomorrow’s episode of the new six-part series The Naked Office being screened on Virgin 1 at 9pm.

More pics here.

You can go back to trolling Craigslist again

Remember this?

Connecticut’s attorney general is demanding the Web site Craigslist cease allowing postings for so-called “erotic sites” he claims promote prostitution.

In a letter to Washington, D.C., attorney Barry Reingold, who represents Craigslist, Attorney General Richard Blumenthal accuses the site of “turning a blind eye” to what he considers a problem.

Last night we had this news---The Connecticut AG lied about serving in Vietnam:

“We have learned something important since the days that I served in Vietnam,” Mr. Blumenthal said to the group gathered in Norwalk in March 2008. “And you exemplify it. Whatever we think about the war, whatever we call it — Afghanistan or Iraq — we owe our military men and women unconditional support.”

There was one problem: Mr. Blumenthal, a Democrat now running for the United States Senate, never served in Vietnam. He obtained at least five military deferments from 1965 to 1970 and took repeated steps that enabled him to avoid going to war, according to records.

The deferments allowed Mr. Blumenthal to complete his studies at Harvard; pursue a graduate fellowship in England; serve as a special assistant to The Washington Post’s publisher, Katharine Graham; and ultimately take a job in the Nixon White House...


But what is striking about Mr. Blumenthal’s record is the contrast between the many steps he took that allowed him to avoid Vietnam, and the misleading way he often speaks about that period of his life now, especially when he is speaking at veterans’ ceremonies or other patriotic events.

At least one former AG can breathe easier today and keep on trolling!!