Friday, March 13, 2020

Buy 'em on Friday the 13th!

Fear not, for I bring you tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people!  
Luke 2:10.

The mass panic has finally enveloped the world and Wall Street! Oh My! MSDNC leads with this this morning!

Schools closed everywhere! Harvard kicks everyone out! Dayton gives students a day to leave! Cancel culture has cancelled themselves!

Wall Street panics! Sell everything, until stock prices are worth as much as toilet paper!

The Bernie Bro's and Lizzy Warren gender benders need to get dramatic about something else!

The courageous left has surrendered. They shutdown the schools. They closed baseball, basketball, hockey, soccer, and XFL, and now they are thinking of closing golf. They shut down Europe!

They've closed EVERYTHING but their mouths! Warning us, cajoling us, berating us, telling us to PANIC! Panic buy em! Buy your stocks from the fools that are selling!

Disney closed it's parks. ESPN is panicked! Oh My! Do you think Wall Street hasn't priced that in?

Buy Disney! At 92? Oh My!

Oil has crashed. Oh My! The banks will puke up loans! The Fed needed to backstop by  $1.5 trillion the non functioning Treasury market! The market that got screwed up, by the Jay Pal, who has tried causing two different recessions in successive years!  But he cried UNCLE because JPM got down to 86! Oh MY!  Buy JPM!!

Apple has crashed.  It hit 237 in the after-hours yesterday. They just re-opened ALL their stores in China! Buy em! Wall Street will tell you it's no good. Always lying. Ever since the Serpent in the Garden of Eden told Eve to take a bite of the Apple! Take a bit of Apple NOW!!

Facebook has crashed. They are giving it away. Wall Street has always hated this stock and so has the media. Of course they do. It's the book of life! It's not the Lamb's Book of Life when we have the judgment of the world, but it's on sale! Buy it!

OK I get it. Why do you have to have Bible references? Can't you just tell us to buy without it?

I just like to remind you of the fearful folly of the "educated" folks who laugh at those who hold God's word to be inerrant! It exposes the heart, so let's expose the folly of Wall Street!

But no one will travel again! No one will fly!

The cruise ships are suspending service. Says who? You? Who is panicking? Try booking an Alaskan cruise. So buy RCL! It's at 30 and change!

No one will fly! No one will fly to Europe!  Buy UAL then!

There are no sports, so you are locked in your house with your kids. No movies. No concerts. No events. No restaurants. Wall Street fund managers are have to be with their wife, instead of their mistress and their lines of coke. How long do you think this will last?

And finally, it's Friday the 13th a new fear Paraskevidekatriaphobia. Fear of Friday the 13th. The mockery of another bottom.

Wait--when was the last bottom? At 666? 11 years ago? Called at the exact moment at 666! You have another bottom!


Thursday, March 12, 2009

Hexakosioihexekontahexaphobia strikes!

The fear of 666!

The S&P hit it's low at 666.

The inflation-adjusted return of the S&P from the 1982 bottom, to the 2000 top was 666%.

The return from the Dow's low of the 1987 crash, to the 2000 high was 666%.

And now, 666 strikes again.

But this time, the fear has been struck into the hearts of the shorts!

And it couldn't happen to a nicer bunch! After all, weren't they the ones playing games with stocks while driving their prices down, all in the name of markets?