KKR Private equity trades at $2.30. It's stated asset value is $18.85.
AP Alternative assets trades at $2.40. It's stated value is $10.30.
Who calculates the asset valuations of these private equity shops? J.C. Flowers, the genius that gave Ken Lewis the heads up to buy Merrill Lynch, because he had already gone over their books?
And at least yesterday, we found out what private equity does besides overstate asset values and assist in failed mergers. They provide a car and driver to former senators and future political appointees whose nominations will now get squashed. Tom Daschle, Obama's nominee for Health and Human Services made the same "innocent mistake" that Timothy Geithner claimed he did. He forgot to pay $140,000 of taxes. But Daschle evaded the taxes due the driver and limo provided to him, for the last three years, courtesy of private equity firm Intermedia Advisors. And like Geithner, Daschle's accountant "missed" these problems. His accountant missed the limo service, missed his fake deductions, and missed the unreporting of his income! Maybe Daschle's accountant could find work with Treasury!
Daschle claimed it was an oversight, because he was always provided a car and driver in the Senate, and he just expected this "perk" in private life.
Daschle also didn't report $88,333 of income in 2007. Another "oversight."
He also "overstated" his charitable contributions by $15,000. So Daschle made up charitable contributions to non existent charities; but supposedly Daschle has been making charitable gifts to legitimate charities, except that he made these "donations" to the legitimate charities with cash, and nobody has any record of them!
But still there is more:
Committee staff still is reviewing whether travel and entertainment services provided to the Daschles by EduCap, Inc., Catherine B. Reynolds Foundation, Academy Achievement, and Loan to Learn should be reported as income.
So then let him keep his private job and limousine, pay his taxes, and stay out of public office!
And let Daschle be the face of private equity's latest "advisor!"
Because none of Daschle's assets, match anybody else's marks!